Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Hooooo, BOY!

I'm currently in Week 16 and it. has. been. FABULOUS! I reread my last post and was so disappointed in myself...I don't even recognize the miserable old coot that wrote it. With the second trimester brings a second wind, so to speak. So far in my "normal" pregnancy, I've followed the classic pregnant-lady symptoms to a T. First trimester: fatigued, nauseous, and severely crabby. Check. Second trimester: lack of symptoms other than a growing mid-section, renewed energy, and glowy-baby-dust happiness. Check.

During Week 15, we saw a perinatal doctor. It was recommended to us by our fertility doctor that we have an amniocentesis done. There are no direct correlations between birth defects from IVF (well, there are plenty of inconclusive arguments regarding that), but we are actually considered "IVF-ICSI" (pronounced ick-see) which puts us at a teeny-tiny bit more slight at risk for potential problems, more specifically, Down Syndrome. I never really discussed ICSI (Intra-cytoplasmic sperm injection) when we did it, because for once, this isn't an issue with me. It's a sperm thing. To make doubly sure that the sperm broke the egg and fertilized on its own to grow into embryos, we had a special procedure where the doctor put Mike's sperm into a needle and injected it directly into my egg. It worked. But clearly, that's never been a problem before either. At least 4 times. 

ANYWAY. Before it actually worked, one would say I'd become a wee bit obsessive-compulsive regarding all things IVF. My perinatal doctor took a look at my chart and said, "Ah! I see you had several graduate courses in infertility". Um, homie, I GOT MY PhD IN IT. Recognize. 

Now that I've achieved what I wanted, I'm struggling with research. There is literally an article about every speck of pain, symptom, and potential problem during pregnancy. They all mean impending miscarriage or my kid will have birth defects, basically. And when you start to read said articles, they start contradicting themselves. Pretty much, every single pregnant person that ever lived is different, therefore, the things I read aren't worth it to me to investigate. I don't like contradictory. I like straight-up facts. The facts I found about amniocentesis were scary, so we went into the perinatal center with shall I say, a shady outlook. 

Once we were called back, I had my very first on-the-belly ultrasound. Up to this point, all of them have been vaginal. This was very reassuring to me; it meant my kid had grown enough to be seen without a doctor digging around inside. The tech spent like, 45 minutes checking every single part of the baby. It was the best experience I've ever had. We've been under a gray cloud since my confirmed pregnancy test (and I'm sure it'll still be floating around until we actually have a live birth). After seeing the human we actually created move around, blink, wave, cross his ankles, well, there just aren't any words!! I hadn't been emotional about finally being pregnant up until the point when I could actually count five fingers on each hand and hear the tech say test after test  "all clear" or "perfectly normal", therefore no need for further testing. It was an incredibly moving experience. 

Then the tech asked if we wanted to know the gender. DUUUUHHHH. Do you know how long it will take Mike and I to decide on a name? We'll need at least 5 months to do that. She flicked the screen over from the top of the head view to the between the legs view. And there in all it's glory, was the most perfect little penis you've ever seen. (Let's not get pervy, that's my little boy we're speaking of for God's sake). 

When you're a girly-girl like myself, you spend your life dreaming of your wedding, your kid's name, and all the ways you're going to girlify your own little girl. While I realize I've known what the gender is from the very beginning, I still had a glimmer of hope for PINK. So when reality hits and you're staring at boy parts on the screen and there's no chance of mistaking THAT, it's a rude awakening. At least it was for me. There were visions of me in my kitchen with a 5-year-old running through the back door with a bucket full of frogs yelling, "Look, Mommy", followed by me fainting and the kid getting worried and knocking over the bucket and all the frogs jumping out all over me and the kitchen floor. I saw me throwing down at a little league game because somebody hit my kid with a ball. I saw Mike with a mini-Mike beside him peeing off my front porch because, God forbid, it would take too much time to walk 10 feet to the bathroom right inside the door. And I saw me writing letter after letter to all children's clothing companies because OMG have you seen how boring little boy clothes are?! 

These were the thoughts running through my head as I lay there on the bed. Meanwhile, Mike has fist-pumped the air fourteen times to the point he has pulled a muscle, has shot off confetti in all corners of the room, started passing out champagne and cigars to random nurses, and has sent off an application to the Green Bay Packers Training Camp to pre-enlist our child for some sort of NFL-related future. 

Needless to say, some of us are beyond ecstatic with the news of our gender reveal. And some of us are...adjusting. I know you're thinking, "She should be thankful for whatever she gets" and you're completely right. But let's be honest, women are partial to girls and men are partial to boys. It's human nature. Or maybe its just my nature? In the end, you love WHATEVER it will be just as much as you would have loved the other gender. It can't go unsaid that I haven't had visions of sweet boy cuddles when he's sleepy or him running to me when he couldn't have his way with his Daddy.

Plus, let us not forget I've got 9 babies on ice. One of them is just BOUND to be a girl...
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